


Scared

by Browneyeblue



Category: Hawaii Five-0 (2010)
Genre: Fluff and Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-04
Updated: 2015-10-04
Packaged: 2018-04-24 16:23:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,657
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4926694
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Browneyeblue/pseuds/Browneyeblue
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A case gets into Steve's head and won't let go.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Scared

He turned to him, looking across the bed at his slack face, peaceful in his morning slumber. He always enjoyed these few moments, the time before the dam of energy burst forth. The time to be at peace and feel whole.

He rolled away, off of the bed, and sauntered to the open window. Perfect. The sun was just beginning to peek over the horizon, pink and orange in awakening. He changed quickly and headed to the beach, ready for his morning swim.

Each thrust, kick, and pull through the water cleared his mind further. He needed the clarity today. He needed to be able to keep working the case. They had been tracking the kidnappers for over two weeks. He was starting to feel the stress of the missing girls. Danny had been on him to sleep, to relax. He was surprised, really, that Danny wasn’t more affected. Somehow, he was managing to put his feelings into the appropriate compartments. He wasn’t sure if he should be worried, or proud.

He just couldn’t shake the images in his head. After so many cases, so many lost friends, lost family, he didn’t know why he couldn’t shake this one, these girls.

He saw him as he came to shore, sitting on the beach chair, coffee in hand.

“Good Morning,” Danny said. “How are you this morning? Swim help?”

“Some.” He said truthfully. “I just don’t know, Danny.”

“Do you want to talk?” Danny knew the answer before he spoke the words. He had been asking Steve the same question every other day for the past week.

“Not now, not today, Danno.” Steve said softly.

“Okay. Here, take your coffee and go take a shower.” He stood and kissed him softly, tasting the salt of the morning swim on his lips. He wasn’t going to give up, he knew Steve too well. He knew the heaviness of his shoulders, the sadness that had set into his eyes. He would keep trying to reach him, letting him know he was there when he did want to talk. He also knew that he may remove the question, and turn it into a statement. Sometimes Steve needs orders, and Danny was the man for the job.

H50H50H50H50

They arrived at the Palace a few minutes before Chin and Kono. Walking quietly and separating at their offices, Steve was once again lost in thought.

Chin knocked on his door. “Steve, HPD has a lead, they took a call this morning about suspicious activity in Nu’Uanu Valley, off the Pali highway.”

“Alright, call SWAT and let’s go. Come on, Danny!” yelled Steve.

H50H50H50H50

They converged on the house. The caller stated that the suspects had been coming and going from a back house on the property. They put SWAT around the house and monitored activity. They split up as they approached, Steve taking the right.

“On my count. One, two, three.” Steve kicked the door, followed by Kono, SWAT entering through the sides, Danny and Chin in the back.

Steve swept the room, taking out the first suspect with a shot to the arm. He turned to see Kono taking out another. He noted three girls under the table in the room, huddled together. Two others were laying behind the couch in the room to his left.

“Clear.”

“Clear.”

“Clear.”

“Clear.”

“Clear.”

Steve was kneeling quickly in front of the table, coaxing the girls out. “What is your name?” he asked of the girl closest to him. Her deep brown eyes peering into his, questioning his help, gauging his sincerity. She broke eye contact to take in his badge and the activity behind him. “It’s okay, you are safe now.” He stated.

She continued to stare, eyes wide and fearful. Steve stepped away and let Kono take over, the girl was noticeably relieved. Kono looked back at him and gave a small nod. He walked away, out of the house, leaving the crime scene to HPD and his team.

He felt like he was out of breath, like his world was slowly closing in on him. He was angry and confused. He still didn’t know why, didn’t understand the effect of this case, why these girls turned his world upside down.

H50h50h50h50h50h50

“Where’s Steve?” Danny asked Kono.

“He went out the front about 20 minutes ago, why? She asked.

“I can’t find him around, and he didn’t answer his phone.” Danny stated.

Danny was starting to get worried. SuperSEAL was not himself this morning, this case had been eating at him over the past two weeks. It seemed that is was time to make his question a statement to his partner. He didn’t care how long it took, he needed Steve to talk to him. Now he just had to find him.

H50h50h50h50

Steve caught a ride with HPD heading back to the Palace. He entered his office ripped off his vest and extra weapons. He wanted to be lighter, to breath deeper, his chest ached with the pain of the case. Feeling light headed, he sat on his couch and practiced his breathing. In-out, in-out, in-out, pulling from his diaphragm, trying to push his thoughts aside.

“It is okay, they are fine, they were rescued, they will be fine, they were rescued, this case is over, this case is over, this case is over.” He said to himself. “They are fine, this case is over.” He continued to chant in his head until his breathing regulated.

“What the hell?!?” He thought, “what is happening to me?” He gathered the keys to his truck and left. He just needed to get away from everything for a few hours, to be alone to work through his thoughts, to find the peace he had this morning.

He drove away from the Palace, leaving his phone on his desk.

H50h50h50h50h50

Danny noted that the truck was gone as he arrived back at the Palace. Somewhat relieved, knowing that at least his partner had made it back to town safely, he headed inside.

The lights were off when he entered and he headed for Steve’s office. Flipping on the light, he took in the scene in front of him. Steve’s vest and back-up gun were sitting on the chair, his phone on the desk. Danny shook his head, attempting to hold in his anger. What the hell was he thinking? He locked up the gun and grabbed the phone.

Stepping out into the bullpen, he pulled up the tracker on Steve’s truck.

H50h50h50h50h50h50

He was lost in thought when he heard the car pull up behind him. Registering the sound of the engine cutting out and the familiar footfall, he braced himself for the rant that was coming.

“Steven.”

He did not turn to his name. He just waited, waited for the rant to start. The sooner it started, the sooner he would go away and leave him at peace with his thoughts again.

Danny took a deep breath and sat next to his friend, and lover. Steve wouldn’t look him the eye.

“Steven. Talk.”

“Danno…” Steve wavered. He was embarrassed, he was ashamed that he couldn’t control his reactions.

“Don’t ‘Danno’, me. Talk to me.”

“I…”

Danny waited.

“I don’t know. I just… I… I close my eyes and I see those girls. Tortured, mutilated. I see the fear in the eyes of the second girl we found. Sarah. She died tortured and alone. And for what, Danny? For someone to make money off of her, for a sick game? She was dead and her eyes were still wide with fear and pain.”

Danny waited.

“I just don’t know. I have seen so much violence, and hate. It just feels different this time. It scares me.” Steve paused, he turned to Danny with eyes shining bright and red-rimmed. “I have never been this scared before.” He whispered.

“Is that such a bad thing?” Asked Danny. Steve started to answer but Danny stopped him with an open hand. “Steven, you may be SuperSEAL but I know you. I know your heart. You may try to hide but you have spent your whole life seeking justice for those that wish to harm innocent people. In the SEAL’s, here in 5-0. I have watched you with Grace, I have seen the softest of gestures aimed at those that we have protected. It is okay to be scared, Steve. It is okay to be worried and to have fears. We all do; me, Kono, Chin, Catherine, Grace, Max, Kamekona, Mary. All of your family, all of the ones that love you, are scared sometimes too. These cases, they can get in your head, make it a jumble.”

He continued, “But you can’t shut down, you can’t push us out, me out! For the first time in your life, you have people that you love and want to protect more fiercely than anyone else. But you have to be able to trust that we will protect you, too. That we will stand beside you whether you are having nightmares or sweeping a building for suspects. I love you, Steven. I love you more than I have anyone in my life and I have been scared too. Scared that you are closing in and closing me off, I couldn’t reach you and when you were gone today, I was scared that maybe I had lost you for good.”

He choked on his last words, looking into the eyes of his lover. The man who stole his heart and was sunshine on his darkest days. “I love you, Steven.”

Steve had tears streaming down his cheeks, leaning in to kiss Danny. Softly, gently, mixing of tears, exploring his mouth. He broke away, touching their foreheads together, “I am sorry, Danno.”

“You don’t have to be sorry,” Danny said, “please just don’t go away again. Please just promise we will talk, that we will explore our fears together.”

“I promise. I love you, Danny.”

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed it! This is my first ever fanfic and I actually got the nerve to post it today. I love these characters, even if the show gets a bit wonky and strange at times. Constructive feedback welcome, unbeta'ed.


End file.
